I'm on an avail for a Microsoft commercial - please send positive thoughts my way

I might be shooting a Microsoft commercial next weekend. I appreciate all love and positive thoughts sent my way.

So what happened to me? I haven't posted a blog in many months!! I was in a coma but I'm baaaccccccccccccccckkkkkkkkkkkk!!!!

Being Happy by Andrew Matthews - great reference book!!

Slash @ HOB on the Sunset Strip on Tuesday, Oct 5th

I checked out Slash at the House of Blues on the Sunset Strip, last night. I haven’t been at HOB in decades. It is still a great “intimate” place to check out talent, as long as you don’t mind standing for several hours. I am not a professional music critic, I only AT ALL COSTS, PROTECT BROOKLYN so for what it’s worth, I enjoyed the opening act, Bad City, a rock and roll band from Chicago, Illinois. In fact I enjoyed them more than the second act, Juke Kartel, from Australia. Juke Kartel put on a good show, just my personal preference, Bad City was more … raw. Ah…I love the uninhabited world of rock and roll. Then Myles Kennedy and his band and Slash hit the stage. It took me a little while before I started to warm up to the band. The crowd was pumped as soon as they hit the stage but hey, put Slash with any headliner band and any rock and roll audience would be pumped. At the close of the night I appreciated Myles Kennedy and the closing band a great deal. They are very “rock” - solid. They performed a few hits from the GNR’s catalog including “Sweet Child of Mine” as well as some strong original material. Overall it was a solid concert. And, unlike many concerts, the opening act started on time, in fact, they actually started 15 minutes earlier than advertised. I plan to check them out, again, tonight. By the way, if you haven’t read Slash’s biography and you’re a rock and roll and/or celebrity music fan, you must pick up that book!

Vega$ here I come! and Flappers

Hey, by chance, if you are in Vega$ this Monday night, September 20th, and you want to hear some chuckles, check me out; I will be performing at the Comedy Festival at the Alexis Park Resort - 10 p.m. show.

Hey I checked out that new comedy room in Burbank, Flappers, last Friday evening -- very nice. Comedians and non comedians, you should check out that club!!!

Hmm, okay, that's it for now.

Alonzo Bodden, Julie Kidd and Vince Harper @ Java Joes

Last Thursday night I had the pleasure of performing with funny man Alonzo Bodden, winner of Season 3 “Last Man Standing.” He was masterful on stage; mixing it up with the audience, successfully trying new political material as well as performing his usual strong A material. Also performing was Vince Harper (very good set) and producer/host, Julie Kidd (of Funniest Houewives of OC), who had a funny and tight set and connected very well with the audience. And I also threw out a few jokes, taking care of business, like Biggie, I had to represent Brooklyn, ya know what I’m saying?

Hey, if you find yourself behind the Orange Curtain in Yorba Linda, you need to check out this place, Java Joes. Man, the place was packed inside and folks were hanging outside. Julie hosts comedy every first and third Thursdays and bands perform Friday and Saturday nights. Really comfortable place. They have a big screen to watch the games Monday night, they serve beer and wine and a lot of tasty treats (this place is also a bakery!!!). And talk about tasty treats, check out the staff that worked that night:



From left to right, Sexy Nicki, Red Hot Kelly, Gorgeous Gloria (owner) and Delicious Bri aka Java Glo and the Javaetts.

Java Joes is located on 4975 Yorba Ranch Road, Yorba Linda, CA 92887 (714) 970-7988

Alonzo and KMA, below.

"Criminal Minds" audition - please send positive thoughts my way!!

Tomorrow morning, @ 11, I am reading at the casting office of the television series "Criminal Minds" and the spinoff "Criminal Minds: Suspect Behavior". I am very excited. Please send positive thoughts my way. Thank you.

Bob Perkell at Cantina Lounge in Fullerton

I got some stage last night in Fullerton. Cantina Lounge -- thanks to producer/comedian/host Bob Perkell. I haven't seen him in years. I had a lot of fun!! Okay, I am watching a taping of the Eagles/GB Packers game...good night everybody.

Allison Breen, Willis Turner, Cary Tobaben, Charles Jaffee and John Henry

At the last minute Dave McNary asked me to fill as the MC last night. We had a rather nice turnout and some very impressive comics. Allison Breen, hmm, don't recall if I have worked with her before. She is funny and clever, a comedian with substance. Well, let me not get ahead of myself. After I opened, John Henry from Chicago hit the stage. Definitely a thinker and has the potential to be one of those guys behind the scene in comedy TV projects; one of those executive producers that most folks don't know. I do hope he attracts the right attention out here in Hollyweird. Willis Turner hit the stage a little later and ripped it. Man, he is very funny and totally committed. He gives the audience 100+ %. He was worth the price of admission, all by himself. Another Ice House regular followed, Cary Tobaben, and he was received well. He has great stage presence and he performed some new material -- way cool. Then Charles Jaffee hit the stage. He has an opening bit that is brilliant. He then followed with another brilliant routine, where he narrates a boxing match between Jesus Christ and Satan. Then Allison Breen graced the stage and she had a solid set. She was one of my two favorites last night. The other was Willis Turner. My boy Robert Murray had some good material. So did Todd Basil and Sean Munley. Kenny McClain closed the night. Love this guy's delivery. He has a story telling type of feel, and he is very funny. Wow, it was a good night!!

Is this It? (jlete version)

Is this it? It's 2:08 in the morning and I'm watching the Detroit Lions play the Denver Broncos...well, I'm watching a recording of the game. I was also looking at jlete on the computer earlier but I won't go there. I should head to bed but my head and heart is not ready. I am restless. Ready to discover the next stage of my "career" (insert laugh track). Or maybe I am not ready. Hmmm. Is this it?

Hey, have you guys seen Michael Jackson's "This Is It"? I saw the movie in the theater. And surprisingly I purchased the movie. Surprisingly why? I don't know. I didn't think I was going to purchase it. But I've watched it several times ... about four times. Pretty darn fascinating. One would say it's just a behind the scenes of rehearsals for a concert. And it is. But it's amazing when you just sit in front of the TV screen, uninterrupted and you watch this...well, change, that, it's amazing when I watch this. It's interesting when you see talent. Talent doesn't have to yell. Talent doesn't have to show all, it's just there. It's funny, I have seen so many ... hey Detroit Lions won, how strange....oh, where was I...oh yeah, it's funny, I have seen so many Michael Jackson impersonators...you know, doing the moon walk, and dancing to Billie Jean, but none of them capture something that I didn't observe until watching "This Is It". None of them capture his heart. His moves were tight and detailed, and many strive to capture that, but his heart colored his moves. I know this might sound corny but man, watch this movie and you'll see how much heart this guy had as he sings and dances and talks. Each music routine crescendos. Have you heard covers of his songs, and they seem just a'ight? How many times have I heard his music...but when I sit down and just watch him, he simply puts it in orbit. He is truly a pleasure to watch and take in. Each view seems to get better. A sign of brilliance. A sign of brilliance is when you can watch a person/performance several times, and you fully enjoy it each time. I've watched that movie about four times and each time I fully enjoy it. (The last time I watched it with my mom and my sister, both just recently released from prison) Wow, what talent. And there is a move he makes after the floor rises at the end of the Thriller production and he is just getting down...wow. A true talent. He is very inspiring. Could you imagine fully loving what you do and it was obvious to others. Wow, what if people felt the same way about me...enjoying seeing me perform the same routines over and over again. Wow, that would be powerful. Hmm, okay, it's 2:33 a.m., and I should be heading to bed, even though I am not sleepy. Thanks for letting me just express myself, and I hope that all of you out there find the courage to pursue what you truly love.

Amy from Brooklyn writes...

Amy from Brooklyn [whatz up gurl!!!] writes "Checked the blog (not in a stalking kind of way..lol...) and your last post looks like June 30th".

What's up with that Mr. Keith Michael Ashton?

Well my computer has been sad aka down for quite some time (tick tock) but I'm getting back (cue Rocky theme music) into it thanks to an Angel (cue harp music) from Miami (cue Miami Vice theme music) who has fathered a fascinating one, who has given my computer life (It's ALIVE!! It's ALIVE!!!) if only just one night (cue that Luther Vandross song). I have also been busy (can we get the sound of many bees), ya know what I'm saying. I have been laying kinda low of late...but as I wrote to Re TAHHHHH...

As I wrote to Re TAHHH, RE TAHHHH from Canada Not Dry via Palm Desert with the eyeball in the pick up, as she raced down the five for you know mon, I'm still out here trying to get from here to there. I want to live in a big house in Pasadena and become a fifthly wealthy recluse who invites insecure middle aged blond aspiring "actresses" to see me as I use my tongue to convince them to join my cult.

I want to give a shout out to my cousin Adrian in Florida and his lovely family.

Hey, have you guys seen the BBC series Couplings? It's amusing.

I might have booked another commercial!!!! Please send positive thoughts my way!!

Looks like I might have booked another commercial today!! It's for a utility company in Southern California. But nothing is guaranteed until it's confirmed through my agent. So pleaseeeee send positive thoughts my way.

Thank you.

Eric Kan, Harmony McElligott, Jason Garrett, Elise Crocker

Hey I MCed the Ice House Annex last week, Father's Day, and I am MCing tomorrow night (Sunday, June 27th). My first thought that I expressed on stage last week was if Tiger Woods's wife gave him anything on Father's Day.

Hey, we had a solid show last week. A lot of funny peeps with different approaches to to their comedy. Eric Kan threw down with thoughts including why would he pay money to view porn? He commented, that would mean that he would have viewed all the free Internet porn -- very funny. Jason Garrett threw down with a solid professional set. Harmony McElligott (and Harmony is a guy) was funny and brilliant -- sharing stories about his life including nearly getting jumped in the hood as he was heading to teach a class. Lucky for him one of the guys in the back of the mob was one of his students and saved the day. Very, very funny. DeLecia White, who had a lot of energy, ended her set with a song called ...cereal. Man, I can't remember the song she used to spoof...but it was a big hit with the crowd. Ending the evening was the sexy Elise Crocker who was "don't give a fuck" funny. Wow, I love watching standup comics. Stand up comedy is not easy and I give props to all that try. Gotta do what you love doing, ya know what I mean. Are you pursuing your dreams? I hope so. Doesn't mean you have to drop everything else, but you should try to bring it more into your life. Gotta pay the bills but you have to come up with strategies to pursue your love...then you will become powerful, brilliant and reap the true benefits of your life.

Okay, I'm out, I was told that tomorrow's night line up at the Annex is gonna be strong. SO if you are in the neiaaaaberhood, drop by and say hello.

KMA

The USA soccer team lost their match today but gotta give them deserved props.

The Beverly Hills Family Variety Show

I had fun at Stevie Mack's Beverly Hills Family Variety show. The Mooney Twins were on the bill. Man, I haven't seen them in a long time and they were a treat to watch. They are identical twins fathered by one of the most respected comics out here, Paul Mooney. Paul used to write for Richard Pryor. I also met a comic named Rolyn Lewis who is producing a show at the Hollywood Hotel, I think beginning on Sunday, July 11th. He asked me to pass by to do some stage time. And I will. Okay, I'm watching the 5th game of Lakers/Celtics, gotta go.

I am performing at Coffee Fix tonight

Coffee Fix
(818) 762-0181
12508 Moorpark St, Studio City, CA 91604
8 - 9:30 pm

I will be performing for approximately 30 minutes. Come out and hang. Thank you Dan Farren for the stage time.

Last minute booking at The Waterfront Theater in Marina Del Rey -- Willis Turner threw down!!

Stevie Mack produces a standup comedy show, "The Heavy Hitters of Comedy" at the Waterfront Theater in Marina Del Rey. He contacted me at the "last minute" to perform last night. Wow, he had a steller lineup. He had a film director warm up the audience and she was very, very funny. Got the audience warmed up with great ad libs and very funny material. I didn't get her last name but her first name was Patricia. Gayla Johnson followed and she was a very strong MC. Reggie Blaze threw down and Stevie Mack headlined and he was very funny. I loved his material regarding a Rockwieller. But my favorite comic was Mr. Willis Turner. Damn, he threw down. I haven't seen him in quite a while and he delivered the goods. Very funny, very confident, very quick ad libber, and he ended strong with his Prince bit. Okay, thanks Stevie Mack for the paid gig, stage time and a very good show. Hey Stevie Mack is doing a lot of impressive things including producing a radio show on the Internet. Check out his website: www.steviemack.com. He is focused with his career. Okay, it's a beauiful day in Southern Cali. I'm going out to have some fun. Oh, I have several shows coming up in June. I will post some of those dates later today or tomorrow. I also have to change the format of my upcoming gigs link on my website, to make it easier for you guys to keep up as to where I am. Have fun and stay positive, stay proactive and be all that you should be.

Happy Birthday Kelle of Fremont, California!!

A very special Happy Bday to a fan who resides in Fremont, California. Kelle, who is the #1 sales person at her high-end bed/mattress store, is going to celebrate her birthday on Tuesday, June 1, with some of her hot gurlfriends. I wish I could be up there and buy a round. I want to also thank Kelle from the bottom of my heart for taking the iniative of emailing a lot of her friends and asking them to vote for me for that recent KTLA comedy competition. Wow, talk about going the extra mile. Okay gurl, have fun on Tuesday sporting that new nose ring -- you have a few things to celebrate -- make each year better than the last!!!

KTLA comedy competition -- so Keith did you make the semi-finalist cut?

I hope all are doing well. I was not chosen as one of the 15 KTLA comedian semi-finalists. I APPRECIATE your support, taking time out of your day(s) to vote for me and spreading the word. There are many opportunities for me and I will continue to pursue my dreams, and I hope that you will always pursue your dreams no matter the challenges.

Enjoy your evening.
Stay thirsty my friends.

Dominic Anthony Bowden, Chelsea Bearce, David Hill and Rick (Dick) Spenneberg

Last night I hosted the show at the Ice House Annex. Dominic Anthony Bowden, whom I haven't seen in years, performed. It was great seeing him; he had some funny material. Chelsea Bearce, a KTLA-TV comedy competition semi-finalist, also performed. She is performing at KTLA station on Monday. I haven't heard from KTLA so I guess I did not make the cut. My favorite comics were David Hill and a comic who moved to Los Angeles from San Diego a few months ago, Rick (Dick) Spenneberg. He was professional and FUNNY. Most comics got ten minutes on stage last night, we let him perform for over 30 minutes. He was the headliner and truly a treat for the audience. I saw him for the first time the last time I hosted the Annex show.

Hey I saw an improvisational show at the National Comedy Theater in San Diego Saturday night, they were pretty entertaining -- Thanks Kay, yer the Best!!

Monthly Fans BONDing series - May

Several of my male fans have asked me to post pictures of some of my female fans on the website. So I have begun a new monthly posting entitled "Fans BONDing Series". We have two entries for May.


#16 - Licence to Kill



#2 - From Russia With Love

Please vote for me in KTLA's standup comedy compeitition

I entered a local Los Angeles TV station (KTLA-TV)'s "Rate a Comic" competition. Please check out my video and other comics' videos and if you enjoy my set, please vote for me. This competition is co-sponsored by KTLA TV and the Jon Lovitz comedy club. The winner gets a booking at Jon's club.

Please use the link below. If you want to vote for me, once you get on that linked page, begin to type "Keith Michael Ashton" in the "Search:" box, (just above the set of comedian videos) - when my name appears, select my name and click "search". Then my video will appear. I believe that there is a circle to click if you want to vote for me. And then select "save vote". You then should see "Vote: Your vote's been counted." and "Thank you for participating".

You can only vote for me once a day BUT you can vote for me again, the same day, if you use a different computer. Thank you.

The link:

http://ktla.upickem.net/engine/Votes.aspx?PageType=VOTING&contestid=16581#SubmissionDisplay

Who Stole the Electric Car? screening in Connecticut

Anybody in the NY or Connecticut area, don’t miss your chance to catch the 1st ever public screening of “Who Stole the Electric Car?”! The film will be part of the Connecticut Film Festival screening this Friday May 5th @ 8:30 PM in the Heirloom Arts Theatre at 155 Main Street in Danbury, CT. For info visit: www.ctfilmfest.com

Ice House Annex tonight

Hey, wow, the show at the Annex featured a lot of funny comics. Jeff Keller had to be one of the treats for the night. Very strong set. I also got to give a shout out to my boy, the very, very talented Carter Gregory. Afterward Carter and I had a lot of laughs at the house (House of Pancakes). Man, it's always nice to see Carter. In fact he will be doing a guest spot at the Ice House Annex on May 16th. Okay, it's 1:40 a.m., I guess I should go to bed. I really don't want to. I could stay up all night and just listen to music. Hey my boy Harvey checked out Conan O'Brien tour in Vega$ at the Palms. He said it was entertaining. Way cool. So much talent out here. Way cool. Good night everybody.

The General Mills' Fruit Roll-Ups Shoot Recap

Hey, that commercial shoot went well last week. I had the pleasure of working with director Harold Einstein. Harold has created award-winning advertising for the likes of Fed Ex, Apple, HP and Little Caesars, and continues his winning ways as a director at Station Film.

I also had the pleasure to work with a stand-up comedian named Mark "leg guy" Fry. In fact I checked him out that night at the Hollywood Improvisation where he was one of the crowd's favorites.

And I have to give an honorable shoot out to our stylist. Striking red-haired, always dressed in black, accented with her distinctive black shoes, Bic Owen. How refreshing to see a stylist who was actually ... stylish.

I'm grateful.

A pic from my vintage files ... well it's not vintage yet, it's from earlier this year -- my Vega$ gigs with the one and only Sharon Lacey.

I'm hosting the Ice House Annex show this Sunday, May 2nd

If yer in town, check me out. I'm just gonna have some fun and celebrate. The Ice House Annex is in Pasadena, California. It's the smaller of two rooms at the Ice House. I think it's a $7.50 cover plus a two drink minimum. And show starts at 7:30 p.m.

Today's the day and I'm ready for my close-up

General Mills' commercial shoot 2 day!!! Let's do this.

Ice House Annex, Sunday, April 25th

Dave McNary came through for me once again. I will be performing approximately ten minutes on stage. The aim is to tape the set and include two minutes that I can use to upload for that KTLA stand up comedy competition. So I need to lay low tonight, write some current events material, get some rest and come out swinging tomorrow evening and then I'm off to my HUNT.

Leonardo da Vinci and Kanye West and Eminem and David DeAngelo

I am listening to some Kanye West, Britney Spears, Keyshia Coles, Drake, Eminem, T. I. (he's back!!!!), Pepe Aguilar, man I just love the authentic talent of Kanye West...

Kanye West on the track by the way, La Keyshia, OK ...I don't love you no more, ANNNNNNND STOP.

Hey my gurl Nancy as well as Diana and Cindy informed me about KTLA's standup comedy competition. They are looking for two minutes of ya best stuff. One needs to upload a 2 minute video onto their website. I will write some new current events material, brush up on my more recent material, come up with a solid two minutes and then find a club where I can tape it and see if it's strong enough to send by this Friday.

Hey I attended a lecture on Leonardo Di Vinci at the Getty last Sunday, Renowned Renaissance artist Leonardo da Vinci had a tremendous range of interests beyond painting. He was also an inventor, an architect, and a scientist committed to uncovering the mysteries of the mind and the body. His observations—documented in thousands of sheets of notes on the arts, the sciences, and technology—demonstrate Leonardo's curiosity in diverse subjects.

Pretty darn amazing. Many of us can barely hold down a 9-5 and this guy was just doing it. I like that...I want to be a Renaissance man. I think most of us are able to do a lot more than we do but we are not inspired on a regular basis.

I have to thank Jaci for inviting me to that lecture.

I love Eminem and Kanye West --

Right now I'm listening to EVERYBODY MOVE...two words, Chi-town...

Should have been signed twice!!!

Wow, it's been awhile since I've had a free Saturday morning. I think Saturday mornings is the best personal creative time for me.

Two words FREEWAY...aye yeah!!!

Eminem and Kanye West are authentic. Very talented and authentic. They stand out. They take a lot of risks. I like reading Eminem's lyrics. He is a good story teller and he seems to be expressing honest thoughts. Sometimes I write my jokes on paper to see how it reads. Am I saying something and is it honest? or am I just writing jokes? I should say something that I am passionate about and I have to blow it up. I need to color with my words.

Scarface's On My Block is now bumping...

I am very curious and I have a lot of energy. I want to keep on evolving and discovering new things and becoming more confident with expressing myself on and off stage. Lenoardo Di Vinci was very curious and focused. He was so focused that he invented things to help him discover more of the things he was passionate about. WOW, that's so serious focus. What if I can do that. What if I pursue all my passions and invented things that allowed me to discover more of what I am passionate about. I would be unstoppable. I would be brilliant. I would be awesome.

Beyonce's Flaws and All is now playing...nice jam.

I don't know why you love me, and that's why I love you, catch me when I fall, accept me flaws and all, and that's why I love you.

I want to play the acoustical and electric guitar, standup bass, keyboards, trombone and sing in a pop/hip hop band.
I want to be a brilliant stand up comic.
I want to be a brilliant voice-over artist.
I want to be a brilliant actor on TV, films and commercials.
I want to produce comedy related aired projects.
I want to be an awesome lover.
I want to be an exceptional mature man.
I want to come up with ideas in my head and then produce them in a timely matter.
I will write and publish a best selling fictional book on living in Los Angeles by 2011.

Oh oh, it's too late, Kanye West's GONE!! Another bad jam
Knock Knock, who's there. KILLER!!!
I ride on chrome!!! Yo, Yo

I have a lot more stuff I want to do

David DeAngelo is the fucking insightful bomb.

I'm ahead of my time, sometimes years out...Kanye West is BRILLIANT!!

I want to be the Kanye West/Eminem of standup comedy. I want to just kill it with honesty in a melodic, sensuous manner. Gotta bring sex to the stage

It's Brittney Bitch and she's a SLAVE 4 U, baby don't you wanna dance up on me, r u ready? Get it, Get it. Why Should I Be Sad.

What's UP? Who's going to run this town tonight? We are. You can call me Caesar in a dark Caesar. Aint' nobody fresher ah, ah

Wha, wha, I said I can give it to you but whatcha gonna do with it?
Jayo Felony, Method Man and DM to the muther fuckin X

Aye damn, music is powerful. That's all I need when I need.

Ayeee now I'm listening to Marc Anthony's No Me Conoces.

I've been running around a lot having a lot of fun but it's now time to get back to the basics and basically work more on my basic self. Time to spend more time by myself, more time writing, more time improving, more time with patience, more time to sleep, more time to rest, more time focusing and more time doing actions so I can attract all I need to attack each time. Time to take it to another level and level the playing field of #10s. Time to turn more heads, especially mine, Time to IMPRESS by showing LESS. Time to take more risks on and off stage, vertically and horizontally. Time to go bed, bath and many steps beyond my usual comfort zone. Time to make phenomenal $$$$ by being phenomenal. Time to buy the ex that red ex pensive car, and ex some of her future ex bills, Time to begin the next HUNT journey, Don't stop believing, Brooklyn born, West Indian Raised and I will b representing.

Thank you Dave McNary for giving me stage time for so many years -- much love to you.

Borrowing Eminem's words:

Ladies and gentleman, introducing the new and improved you know who...
There's more music/comedy/kmady to make,
Keep makin' new shit,
Produce hits to break
the monotony,
What's gotten into me?

The answer, Leonardo da Vinci and Kanye West and Eminem and David DeAngelo.

I GOT THE COMMERCIAL!!!! I GOT THE COMMERCIAL!!

Thank you so much for your positive thoughts. I just got the call from my agent. I booked that cable national Fruit Roll-ups commercial!!

UPDATE Commerical call back for Fruit Roll-Ups

I did receive some good news today from my agent. I was put on avail for that commercial I auditioned for on Monday. That means that they want to make sure that I’m available and that they might use me. For this commercial they need to match the look of a young boy to the look of the older man, the role I auditioned for. Please continue to send me positive thoughts. Thank you.

Commerical call back for Fruit Roll-Ups

I have a commercial call back for a Fruit Roll-Ups national cable commercial. So please send me positive thoughts this Monday morning.

Things are heating up this summer for “Who Stole the Electric Car?”

Things are heating up this summer for “Who Stole the Electric Car?”, an independent film I shot in 2008. I portray the role of detective Tinson. The film got accepted into three very prestigious film festivals!

The True Independent Seattle Film Festival (one of the country’s “greenest” film festivals) accepted the film to be in this year’s program. Will be shown at The Northwest Film Forum theatre on Saturday, June 5th at 9:15pm. Please check the website (www.trueindependent.org) the week of the festival in case they add a 2nd showing or make any last minute schedule changes.

We are also honored to be invited over to Europe this summer to be part of the 17th FICMA Environmental Film Festival in Barcelona, Spain! The Festival Director (Jaume Gil Illopart) loved the film the first time he saw it, and thought it was very funny. “Who Stole the Electric Car?” will screen Sunday June 6th at 8 pm.

And we also just got the exciting news that out of a field of hundreds of feature length films submitted this year “Who Stole the Electric Car?” was accepted to the prestigious Connecticut Film Festival! That festival runs May 4th - 9th 2010, in Danbury, CT.

Carmen's Comedy Club in Selah, WA. on Friday and Saturday, April 2nd and 3rd

In case you are in this neck of the woods
316 S 1st St, Selah, WA (509) 698-3900
Friday, April 2nd and Saturday, April 3rd
7 and 9pm both nights
should be a lot of fun!!!!

Thank you

Thanks for all of you who came out to the Ice House last night, and for those of you who sent me well wishes before the show. It was a very fun show. Henrietta was the first comic up after my MCing and she came out swinging, and Cornbread ended the evening with his high energy entertaining assault. My favorite comic was Dick Spenneberg -- he was tight, professional and extremely funny.

BIG SHOW THIS SUNDAY, MARCH 14th, I NEED YOUR SUPPORT AND LOVE!!!!!!

I will be performing at the Ice House Annex in Pasadena, this Sunday, March 14th. The show starts at approximately 7:30 p.m., but get there by 7:00 p.m. because I will be the first comedian on stage, as the show's host. The show will end at approximately 10 p.m. There are two rooms at the Ice House; I will be performing in the more intimate room, the Annex. Limited seating so please come early!!!

The Ice House is located at 24 North Mentor Avenue in Pasadena , CA 91106 , one block east of Colorado Blvd. and Lake Ave. The entrance is in an alley. There is street parking and public parking. For more information visit the website: www.icehousecomedy.com/html/directions.htm

By the way, don't forget On Sunday, March 14, 2010 at 2 a.m., Daylight Saving Time begins. We will be moving our clocks one hour ahead.

Thank you for your support,
Keith Michael Ashton

Angie's List Commercial-Kitchen Dentist

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rxHQPRX-ixY

I'm on the Radio

Hey I was on the radio last Wednesday. On VIP Vegas Radio -- way cool. I had fun. That's it. Okay, bye.

I'm on the hunt for Ms. Hunt

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cb24kLd459Y

We Want Keith-ie

I have two bus loads of fans that follow me every where I go. It’s weird. They park outside my residence and even when I just step outside for a quick minute to check my mail, they start cheering, waving at me and yelling my name (to the music of We Want Eazy-e)

Bus driver over speaker system: There he is!!!! Tell him, who you came to see
Fans: KEITH-IE, we want KEITH-IE
Bus driver over speaker system: Everybody come on,
Fans: KEITH-IE
Bus driver over speaker system: Who'd y'all come to see?
Fans: KEITH-IE
Bus driver over speaker system: A little louder come on!
Fans: KEITH-IE
Bus driver over speaker system: Get those hands in the air!
Fans: KEITH-IE
Bus driver over speaker system: Come on, come on-say it!
Fans: KEITH-IE
Bus driver over speaker system: Hey yo tour guide, lets do this...

(Tour guide gets on speaker system)
People from everywhere gather around
Checkin' out the comedy that Keith-ie is throwin' down
With some help from God and dad and mom
Makin' a way with dope styles
Yo KEITH-IE, what ya gotta say?

(Then I shyly chime in with a high voice on the up beat)
I’m a miracle of modern creation
KMA on the set
Hyped up with the bass
And a little bit of what ya love
From a brother who's smooth like a criminal
I mean subliminal
Otherwise known as a villain
Because I'm ruthless
When I spot a good joke, I kill 'it
But most I think know not to deal with me
Yo, it's obvious, tell 'em who you came to see
(Then I begin to tease them with my pop and lock dance moves)

Fans going wild: KEITH-IE
Bus driver over speaker system: Everybody come on!
Fans: KEITH-IE
Bus driver over speaker system: A little louder say it!
Fans: KEITH-IE
Bus driver over speaker system: Come on say it, say it, say it!
Fans: KEITH-IE

A person on the second bus yells: Why you share true life experiences on stage, Keith?
Me: I share true life experiences on stage, fo' easy authentic access baby.

A person on the first bus yells
Yo Keith, where we takin' this jam to?
Me: ALTADENA
Where?
Me: ALTADENA

As I move my shoulders to the beat I open my arms wide toward my fans and yell:
All of Me, why don’t you just Take All Of Me (yes, my tribute to Hillsong United)
I’m just playing, the playing, the playing
Welcome to Fantasy Island
(just then three of my neighbors come out and we do a little synchronized steps together and the bus load of people go ape wild as they hit the record button on their video cams.)

(I start to do the moon walk around BOTH buses. The crowd can’t control themselves and the buses begin to literally shake side to side, as I bust out these last rhymes.)
Aw, never, I'm just too clever
So, in fact, that no one can sever
A blow from a maniac and yo, I make it clear
So a register is all I hear
Money overturned, then I jet
To make another comedy routine, for you to go and get
Comedy shows sold out because you love it
Another example of how Keith-ie duz it

EVERONE:
We want Keith-ie...

Then I wave and head back inside my apartment to watch my DVR recording of First 48 Hours.

Life on Wilshire (with Keith), Tuesday, March 9th NO COVER, NO MINIMUM PURCHASE

6311 Wilshire Blvd. , Los Angeles CA. 90048 - (323) 651-5433
Show starts at 9 pm. My spot is between 9 and 10 p.m. No cover, no drink minimum. My first time at this room. Let's see what happens because I wanna rock right now.

Ice House Annex, Sunday March 14th, @ 7:30 p.m. PUNCH TV

I will be MCing the Ice Ice Baby room at the world famous Pasadena's Ice House. It's actually the Annex which is the "baby", stage, the more intimate room. Hey Punch TV might be there to check me out so please come out to support me. I think the cover is $8.50 with a two drink minimum. Hey, I will be heading to Bistro 45 afterward for a drink. Have you been to Bistro 45? Awesome place to hang. Great food but more impressive is their service. Mike, Bryan (it's the Mike and Bryan show), Eric, and newbie McHale (don't know the spelling) are really cool. So if you can hang till the end of the show, which will be approximately 10 p.m., join me at Bistro 45 bar (down the block from the Ice House…10 minute walk).

Leaving Las Vegas

Well I had a blast in Vega$. Won some money on the Super Bowl, and had fun sharing my standup comedy knowledge (albeit limited) with a gathering of standup comic newbies in a meet up group. Joe Lowers and Sharon Larcy also shared their experiences.

Sharon and I then headed to Boomerang (or is it Boomerangs), in the hood and had a fun time! Sharon came out firing and I followed with my usual brilliant observations.

My best friend was in the audience and he got in to a verbal fight with three cuties because they were speaking loudly on the phone when Sharon was ending her set.

But all went well.

Then on 2sday, Sharon and I performed in Joe Lowers' room at the Alexis Hotel. We had fun!!!

Then I had to head back to Los Angeles and complete preparation for my TBN shoot. Call time 10 a.m., the next day, in lovely Simi Valley. It went very well. Director Jeff Wood had a professional and great crew. I am very fortunate to have worked with them.

I have an acting audition on Friday, and then one on Saturday. BUT my car engine light came on today....it came on before I headed to Vega$ and I thought it was handled by my mechanic...BUT obviously it was not!! Know I need to figure out how I'm going to get to my audition as well as handle my heavy social life tomorrow evening and the weekend without my car. And why is it that my car always senses when I have extra $$$???

Okay, I'm about out of here --- time to work on the sides 4 tomorrow.

Hmm, I see that Amelia Borella shot me an email -- she's taking a break from standup...WHAT!?!?! I gotta email her and find out what's happening. She's too talented and hilarious 2 b taking a break.

My first paying acting gig for 2010

Hey I got my first paying acting gig for the New Year. It's a one man dramatic vignette that will be used to open an episode of the TV talk show Lifestyle Magazine will air globally on TBN and Hope Channel.

I auditioned and got booked the same day. YIPPEE!!! I also auditioned for a series of funny commercials -- anti Mac commercials.

Hey I started to write a book. It's gonna be personal and huge...YOU WILL SEE.

Hope all is good out there. I've been inundated having fun in the Southern Cali sun but now I'm baaaacccckkkk and I'm ready to have some more fun on the stage.

Don't stop believing. Hey, I got to get together with my man Carter Gregory and write some more funny stuff.

Tuesday, February 9th, Las Vega$ take 2

Las Vegas Comedy Show featuring Joe Lowers at the Alexis Park Hotel is welcoming Sharon Lacey and myself to his stage to do a little bit of stand-up comedy brilliance.

Joe Lowers has been entertaining audiences for over 15 years, and his ability to involve the audience has made him a one-of-a-kind comedian. Now in the newly remodeled showroom with its two large video screens, he's able to add video to his show. Joe not only involves the audience, he involves the other comics working with him, plus the sound guy too.

I meet some hottie a few years ago in Vega$ and she introduced me to the comedy stylings of Joe Lowers.

I think it's $29.95. I assume it includes drinks. Show starts at 9 p.m. I will update.

Pegasus-Alexis Park
375 East Harmon Avenue
Las Vegas, NV 89169-7081

Monday, February 8th -- new material in Vega$

Boomerang
6650 Vegas Drive
Las Vegas, NV 89108
(702) 631-4711
No cover charge
I believe the show starts at approximately 9:30 p.m.
Sharon Lacey will also perform
It's a work out room
If you are in town for the Super Bowl celebration, pass by and say hello and check out some of the local Vega$ comedians!!

Amelia Borella

Amelia Borella is the comedian I saw for the first time in Amsterdam Cafe. She was very funny!!

This is it

Kanye West for his confidence with his creativity and commercial success and the ability to be killing these ns.

Peyton Manning for his ability to read the defense and change the play within seconds and get the yardage.

MJ for his genuine love for his God given talent and for his passion.

Sharon Lacey for her focus and determination to perform just about anywhere at anytime, no matter what.

I'm thinking positive and I'm bringing the brilliance.

New material

Okay, working on new material. I am working on a bit about dating mothers and how some of them are obsessed with their children. They want you to read their child's report that they wrote back in first grade, or some moms have a tendency to remember events in their past by correlating them to the age of one of her kids at that time. "Yeah, that was in 1992, yes, 1992 because my youngest son was just five years old..." Or by what house they were living in at that time of an event. "That was in 1985 because I was living in Venice at that time" I am also working on another bit about some women who, when they greet me or when we say goodbye, hug me but purposely swing their body away from me...I guess so I won't get the wrong idea....oh man, it would be funny if a women did the complete opposite, if they are into me, by turning around and bending over, pushing their butt into my crouch..."nice meeting you Keith, (then she turns around, bends over, and peeps behind her looking at me) hope to see you again." I'm laughing right now (okay, maybe you're not) AND I want to make fun of a commercial of the new Steven Segal reality show, where cameras follow him as a deputy sheriff. Voice over of Steven Segal's husky low voice...I've made a living in the movies. But over the past 20 years, I've been a cop. My name is Steven Segal. then we see him yelling at a guy for not obeying orders when he was being pulled over and the guy looks up, stares at Steven with a confused and frighten look and then squeals, "man, that's Steven Segal!!" This guy probably is thinking, "man, I'm so fucking high right now, I'm hallucinating that I just got pulled over by Steven Segal." Probably that's what he'll tell his friends the next day. "Man, I tell you, I have to stop getting high. Last night I was so fucking high that I swear I was pulled over by Steven Segal."

Now that's funny!!! Okay, just a peek at the comedy mind of Keith Michael Ashton...

Hey, I had fun last night at Amsterdam Cafe. Some very funny folks. There was one woman who had me in stitches. Man, she was funny, I need to get her name. Got to give her some props on my website.

A great quote from Seal

I love this quote from Seal, "But we're never gonna survive, unless we get a little crazy"

Or from the Purple Majesty (aka Prince), "let's go crazy!" "let's get nuts!"

My audition for Detective Roebuck in Chop

Well I had my audition for that detective role in the movie ... Chop. I had a good read. I had fun. When I audition for a detective role I usually like to wear my over the shoulder or side gun holster with my gun (not a real gun, of course) and my handcuffs and badge but I was a bit apprehensive wearing the gun at this audition because the audition was in a business building (versus a studio lot), and I think it was inappropriate of me to carry the gun onto the premises...but I wanted to completely sell myself...so I struggled, mentally in my car after I parked, deciding if I should bring the gun. I decided not to. Before I headed to the audition suite, I stopped by a medical clinic on the first level off the building to borrow a stapler so that I can staple my resume onto my headshot(DUH Keith, you weren't prepared). After getting permission from the cutie behind the counter, and as I reached over for the stapler, I noticed a woman standing in an office in the back looking at me with concern. I think she saw my handcuffs and gun holster. So I jumped over the counter and pistol whipped both the cutie and the woman in the back office, then I snatched their purses and jumped back over the counter...oh, what, sorry, I'm losing it...I didn't do those things, I just thanked the cutie for the stapler, and walked off very slowly in my detective with bad news bravdo.

I headed upstairs to the audition. There stood a very attractive actress waiting for her turn to audition. Finally it was my turn. They seem to appreciate how I look. I had a good read. Mission accomplish. Hope I get it. I would be sweet!!!

Great Quote from Drew Barrymore

Quote from Drew Barrymore, "Let your freak flag fly, and if someone doesn't get you, move on."

CHOP, CHOP, CIOP

Hey wish me luck. I will be auditioning for a detective role for a movie by producer Chad Ferrin called Chop. It will be another detective role for me!! Det. Roebuck. The sides looks good. I'm very excited. So this Friday at 12 noon, think of me, that's when I'll be auditioning!!

I had an audition today for a Wells Fargo commercial. It went well. I look good as a banker.

I friend of a friend told my friend (are you keeping up) that he saw me in a commercial. Its a commercial I shot last year...I was a doctor. Hmm, can't remember what the commercial is selling...I'll have to look it up.

Bye-bye

This Friday, October 16th - I'll be in North Hollywood

Amsterdam Cafe
10905 Magnolia Boulevard
North Hollywood, CA 91601
(818) 506-1938
Show starts at 7pm
I get 10 minutes
This will be my first time performing at this venue
Hmmm, I think it's a small coffee house
whatever, come join me, it's gonna be fun!!
oh, this is a Anna Lane Sugarplum Productions
Got to give the producer a shout out!!

Sunday, October 11th

Ice House Comedy Club
24 N Mentor Ave
Pasadena, CA 91106-1745
(626) 577-1894

I will be performing 7-8 minutes in the Annex room

I you come just to see me I'll get you in for free.
If you want to stick around and check out the other comics -- two drink mininum.

Saturday, October 10th

Moose Lodge
1901 West Burbank, Burbank 91506
(818) 842-5851
Show starts at 7:30.
Cover is a one drink mininum
For the price of the drink you get a good time and a prize ticket - they give away prizes.

I will be performing 6-7 minutes -- some new material!!

Hope to see some of you there!!

Thursday, October 8th

OASIS NIGHTCLUB
1386 East Foothill Blvd. UPLAND, Ca 91786
(Just 35 miles East of Downtown Los Angeles)
10 PM

Who Stole the Electric Car?

Going to the the screening of Who Stole The Electric Car. This is a movie I worked on with directors James and Robert Dastoli. Visit the official website at www.whostoletheelectriccar.com.

SHOW JUST ADDED!!

SATURDAY NIGHT, SEPTEMBER 26!!!
Zabumba
10714 Venice Blvd. Culver City, CA 90232
No cover, no drink minimum
7:30 pm
This Brazilian eatery is pretty cool
come down and meet my mother
I'll be doing my "good son" set
NOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hey funny man Carter Gregory passed by. Great seeing him. It's a must for you to see this guy live!!

Last Thursday I checked out Anthony J Brown's club, the J Spot. Roz Brown was hosting. Great room!!

Thursday, August 13th @ 8pm in Santa Monica - The Evil Comedy Hour

"The EVIL COMEDY HOUR"

Westside Comedy Theater
1323-A 3rd Street Promenade
Santa Monica, CA 90401
ph: 310.451.0850
You can find us in the alley between 3rd & 4th St.at the back of the Parking Garage S3 (Structure Three, whose entrance is on 4th Street just north of Santa Monica Blvd).
Tickets are $10 but email me for 2 for 1 admission infor
Emcee/Producer Raven Byron!!

Friday, August 28th @ 9pm, Cum C Ms. Lacey and Me

Coffee Haven
1708 E Broadway
Long Beach, CA 90802-3709
(562) 437-3785
If you find yourself in da LBC, you should pass by to check me out as well as a road comic from Portland, Oregon, who goes by the name of Sharon Lacey. We both will have 6 minutes. So I guarantee you 12 minutes of solid comedy for ya.

Thursday, August 20th, The Broadway Walk/Fashion Walk's Comedy Marathon

"The Broadway Fashion Walk" presents
"COMEDY WALK"
LOCATION:
BROADWAY-SPRING ARCADE BUILDING
542 S. Broadway - Los Angeles , CA 90013
(Parking in large garage between 4th & 5th on Spring Street for $5.)

King of Comedy Walk, comedian Stevie Mack, is back hosting this downtown L.A. evening of hilarity. I have a 8:10 pm, 10 minute slot. Hope you can stop by!

Wednesday, August 5 @ 9pm -- Zina's Restaurant and Bar

Zina's Restaurant and Bar
4525 Calle Mayor Torrance, CA 90505
310-378-2777
@ 9pm
10 minute set
Zina's hosts Hollywood's undiscovered comics with "Comedy On The Rocks" hosted by Joey Garza. Relax, have a couple of drinks, a bite to eat & a few laughs. No Cover. 2 Drink Minimum.

Ice House Annex Emcee -- Sunday, July 5th

Hey, I'll be emceeing the Ice House Annex, in Pasadena, tonight. Pass by and check out the show. Show starts at 7:30 p.m. Cover an two drink minimum.

Some up coming June gigs...

Tuesday, June 10 @ 9:00 pm
1160 Bar & Lounge
located in the basement of The Hotel of Hollywood (it's a Ramada hotel chain)
1160 Vermont Avenue
Hollywood, CA 90029
it's a free show, ya'll
(and free parking in the back off of Lexington Avenue)
This show is produced by the sexy & talented Roxy,
so if you don't come to see me, come to see Roxy!

Hey, this was a fun show. We had a fun couple from Utah in the audience and a handful of funny comics!!

Wednesday, June 11 @ 8:30 pm
Burbank Moose Lodge
1901 West Burbank Blvd.
Burbank, CA 91506
(3 blocks east of Buena Vista, north side of street)
$6 (which includes admission and a drink)
so you see a good comedy show and you can get yer drink only for $6
it will be my first time here...cum join me!!

Sunday, June 14 @ 7:30 pm
Ice House -- Annex stage
NO SHOW!!!!

24 N Mentor Avenue
Pasadena, CA 91106

(626) 577-1894

I will be performing for just about...hmm, maybe five minutes after the MC...so don't pay the cover if you just cum to see me...just see me before the show and I'll get you in to see my set...if you want to see the entire show...you will have to pay the cover and 2 drink miniimum.

NO SHOW!!! If you want to see me tonight...see me at Dave's on Broadway...

Sunday, June 14 after 8:30pm
Dave's on Broadway
708 E Broadway
Glendale, CA 91205
(818) 956-9123
this is a dive bar (drinks are cheap)... a singer/guitarist is scheduled to perform...I'll be doing some time when he takes a break...hey, I might host/produce a standup comedy show on a regular basis in this room...so come see..the beginning!!! (no cover) And I have to give a shout out to the beautiful bartender who invited me, Regina!!!


Monday, June 22 @ 8:15 pm
Skinny's Lounge
4923 Lankershim Blvd.
North Hollywood, CA 91601
it will be my first time here...enter at your own risk!!

Hey everybody, this Saturday, May 30, I'll be on VIP Vegas FM Radio. The show's hosts, Harvey and Michael will be on the air from 12 - 2pm (PST). For more information, check out their website @ www.vipvegasfm.com. Call in @ 702.731.1230 and ask me a question.

And this Sunday I will be working on some new and old material at The Ice House Annex in Pasadena @ 7:30pm. If you come by, say hello!!

Take care!!
KMA

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